Bro Lounge general advising;
---
BRO LOUNGE GUIDE TO GETTING GIRLS
Countless times the bro lounge has picked up on some chumps in IRC whining about some girl that just friend zone'd their asses. And quite frankly, the brouncil is sick of it. So as a service to the greater Toribash community, our team of ladies men have put together this handy-dandy little guide to turn you into a Casanova. LET'S READ ON.
1. Be fashionable. Holler holler pop that collar. You ever heard of Iron Fist? The baddest martial artist in the Marvel Universe? Well he pops his collar and do you think anybody fucks with him? Hell no, and the girls love his K'un L'un swagger.
2. Have a colorful vocabulary. Swearing shows bitches that you're the fucking man and you just don't give a crap. Asshole. frick you.
3. Be active. Nothing shows you're a real man than the fact that you love to pack down with a bunch of other real men and push each other around in a violent sweaty haze for a couple of hours, just to cool down in a group shower afterwards.
4. Show some culture. Girls love cultured men, and a cultured man should always have a good understanding of cinema. What better way to impress than to flaunt your knowledge of the most moving and powerful saga in recorded history. Star Wars. You give a list of the key events leading to the foundation of the Empire, and she'll be on all fours in no time.
5. Playful teasing. They loved it in 2nd grade and they love it now. A little bit of harmless teasing can really pull you and your Miss Right together. Here's a couple of guaranteed charmers; "Wow! Is that you, _____, or did some ugly female dog eat _____?", and "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because it looks like you landed right on your face in a thorn bush. Put some make-up on you stupid tramp."
6. Entertain her. A few simple magic tricks can go a long way. Put a few dazzlers in your arsenal that you can do anywhere. For example, ask for a $20 note. With a little bit of sleight of hand put it in your wallet, and she'll be all giggles! And you'll be laughing all the way to the bank, bro!
7. Be a fun guru. Show her that when you get to doing the nasty, you'll know what to do. Name-drop your favorite porn stars and their finer works, including a quantitative measure of their quality, like how many times you've fapped to it. Be careful though, you don't want to use your encyclopedic knowledge of skin-flicks in a discriminatory fashion. Show her that you're diverse by mentioning your favourite gay porn too.
8. Embody fitness. If you don't go to the gym for 4 hours a day, how will you be able to protect her? Make sure she KNOWS you're one muscly motherfucker by taking your shirt off and roaring to make a first impression.
9. Passionate. Passion is an attractive quality, and nothing shows passion like getting something etched into your skin forever. Girls also love shopping, so if you get a bunch of brand names for ink, she'll be all over you. Write a thank you letter to Dolce & Gabbana when that forehead tat pulls all the chicks.
10. Apathy. This is the key. They want what they can't have, so follow a few simple rules, and the game is won. Never call her, if she says you in passing, don't say hi, if she comes over, don't open the door, and if she's naked in a bed waiting for you, go make a sandwich and play Black Ops.
Put together by your friendly neighbrohood bro lounge.
---
Hacks' advice on how to be a good looking Bro:
---
Bro Lounge Bro to Bro Guide; How to succeed in the first date.
Many Bros don't know what to do on the first date, the Brouncil is sick of seeing sad bros so we have made this guide for you to understand what to do on the first date and how to give a good impression, we ensure you will get lucky.
The first impression. This is the most important part of the whole date, make sure you are dressing like a Bro, shown in 2worlds guide on how to look like a legit Bro. Chicks dig man who can protect them and are hard to get, play hard to get and threat her like a dipshit while showing your big biceps, swearing is a big plus in the first impression, try to make hilarious jokes on how the frick she is an ugly whore or how an stupid dumb female dog she is, most important of all, always force her to call you her "daddy".
Dinner time. Don't even think about taking her to nice restaurants, take her to a cheap restaurant and threat the staff like crap to show your position as the macho alpha. When you are done eating complain about the food tasted like crap and don't pay anything, make sure to show your big biceps all the time. Remember, if the manager of the restaurant proves that your food was completely fine and didn't taste like dog crap trying to make you pay, tear your shirt apart and yell "Who's your daddy" until he runs away, if by any chance it doesn't work, force your date and make her pay for everything.
NOTE: This might not work with cops.
Qualified Restaurants:
* McDonalds
* Burgerking
* Taco Bell
Taking her home. After having a nice free meal you must make her feel like a woman again, remind her who is her daddy and slap her like a fucking female dog until you can't be stressed enough, keep in mind if there's no blood, it's not enough. Obviously she will take you in if you follow these easy points, the next is up to you Bro.
taken from friend
Mon Feb 25, 2013 6:51 pm by 
